Tuesday, May 22, 2012


Found an old journal entry I had saved as a notepad thing. Thought I'd rebuke some of the statements made in the entry.

I understand and accept that I am depressed.

But I'm working to get better

I am useless and offer more burden than happiness.

That's why I'm joining something bigger than me. Something I know I can be useful in. Something I can achieve dreams in.

I am selfish and manipulative.

Haven't fixed this one.

I am loud and obnoxious.

So why not train?

I am incapable of seeing others' views.

This one is a lie, now.

I am a failure.

I am successful. I made all A's and a C in my hardest semester yet.

I am a bad girlfriend.


I am a disappointment.

I disappoint myself. It's why I'm always striving to be better

If I stay, I bring frustration and anger.

Social problems.

If I go, I am selfish.

Darling you got to let me knooooow

I am worthless.

No I'm not.

I serve no purpose.

At least I'm missed during Hangouts.

I am emotionally draining, And monetarily taxing.

No rebuttal

My knowledge is superficial.

I must learn more.

I am a fake.

I am real.

I will never get it right.

But I will keep trying

I hate myself.

I hate lack of motivation.

And I understand that everyone else does too.

This is untrue.

I will be forgotten.

I will be remembered.

I have been before.

This is why it can't happen again.

No one really cares.

Friends and family care.

I'm ugly.

I'm a bombshell.

I'm out of shape.

I can run, do pushups, and crunches. I play sports. I'm fit.

I'm lazy.

What 19yo isn't?

I procrastinate,

I'm in college. Of course I do.

I hate me.

I've learned to love me

You can, too.

Love me too.

Why do I still write in this? No one reads it...

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